4 Thoughts Of International Marriage

A while ago, Cupid Blogger did brew up the discussion of relationships along the lines of religion, race and culture.

While I believe that the world has become a global village, there are still glitches in accepting and acclimatizing when we marry someone from a different country with contrasting culture and tradition.

Even movie celebrities Michelle Yeoh and Elizabeth Hurley hit headlines with announcements of their engagements… to partners of foreign nationalities.

Michelle Yeoh & Jean Todt

Michelle Yeoh & Jean Todt

Elizabeth Hurley & Arun Nayer

Elizabeth Hurley & Arun Nayer

In the celebrated world of high-profile personalities in the international arena, these personalities should be able to fit into any background.  This is especially true for movie stars who are at ease with masking themselves behind various expressions, roles and environments.

But has it been any easier to handle international marriage for the average man and woman (like myself)… even in the course of globalisation?

Even when two people enter into a marriage, each holds equally responsibilities to change, sacrifice, and give-and-take.  How much more for people from different cultural backgrounds and upbringing environments – when they decide to tie the knots – they need to consider factors such as linguistic, family acceptance, financial, immigration and relocation, emotional values and the list goes on.

For them, the journey of courtship and the walk towards marriage can be a challenging (if not, exciting) one.  But love is their source of strength to overcome the mountains, seas and storms to reach the green pasture of a blissful relationship. But before taking the big leap of love, here are some factors to ponder upon…

1. Cultural background

  • How significantly different is that culture from your own?
  • Are both of you familiar (or quite familiar) with each other’s culture?
  • Have you both spent much (or any) time in each other’s country?
  • Will you both have culture shock?
  • If yes, are you both prepared for it?
  • Would you be willing to relocate to his/her country if necessary?

2. Your spouse-to-be

  • How well do you know each other?
  • Do you know each other well (enough)?
  • Are both of you comfortable communicating with each other?
  • Can you both accept each other’s ‘bad’ habits?
  • Is he/she someone you would like to grow old with?

3. Financial situation

  • Will he/she be able to work here? Or will you be able to work there?
  • If not, either way, can you support him/her until they find a job?
  • Does he/she expect you to support his/her family financially?

4. Language compatibility

  • Do you both speak at least one mutual language?
  • If no, are you willing to learn his/her language?
  • Will he/she be willing to learn your language?
  • Will you both be willing to learn a mutual language?
  • Although not as important, but will he/she be able to communicate with your family?

Even the legendary Bruce and Linda Lee reaffirmed the communion of international love.

Sometimes, being in a new family, our mind may make us believe that people around us have formed stereotypical opinions of the ’emigrant’ or the ‘foreign partner’. But be proud and hold on to your heritage and culture, while fitting in and thriving (not just surviving), and you’ll be amazed that the differences are not the race, culture or religion… the differences are in our minds.

What do you think?  Are we different by colour, culture, language or religion?  Or are we just different in our mindsets – of how differently we look at things around us? Feel free to share a piece of your mind with our readers.

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  1. In my opinion, all the 4 tips are important…but for me personally, most important is understanding and tolerance…

    You need to understand each other before proceeding to further commitment like marriage rite? But somehow some of my friend mentioned that..women are meant to be loved and to understand?

    What do you think? :)

    • WOW! That last line is like literally puts women on the winning side – free from responsibilities! Although women are meant to be loved and to understand, I believe men deserve the equal treatment. Love is a 2-way communication that develops into companionship and eventually relationship – intimate relation. So, man or woman, we play equal roles in building a lasting relationship, especially in relationships with someone from a different culture, race or country.

      jamie’s last blog post..huh?!

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