‘I Only Date White Guys’: Fancy or Fetish?

I was randomly reading through blogs when I came across a link to this video on YouTube.

The title seemed pretty interesting, albeit a little racist at first sight,

but after watching it through and still not having come up with an answer a whole day later,

I wanted to share this with the rest of you Cupid Blogger Readers, and if you’d oblige, get your take on the matter:

YouTube Preview Image

I understand that some people might have preferences – short, tall, nerd, or jock – and none of these normally garner the attention of as much as an eyelash. However, wanting to date someone of only a specific skin color (regardless of shade) has you being pegged a racist… and for what reason?

Everyone will have their own opinion on this – some might find it upsetting, some might feel a tad bit betrayed, and some might just think it’s someone’s own prerogative and get on their merry way. I think there’s something to be said for the three reactions you’re most likely to expect, and let me go on to elaborate WHY.

It’s of course a little bothersome. We would all like to think that we’re beyond a certain level of judgment but this video is a reminder that some people out there are still rejected because they’re a certain type of color. Surely we’ve had enough of that, and really, while there are differences that cannot be denied, it doesn’t mean one is any more capable than the other. There’s no doubt that Whites and Asians are very different in comparison, but would it have been better if the girl in the video had said ‘I prefer guys of a particular upbringing‘ or ‘I like my men with more hair than me‘? A person is molded by both genetics and social aspects, and if we so happen to lean in favor towards a feature that is distinctly White/Asian, does that make us racist?

Some of you might actually identify with feelings of betrayal as well. I know I did, and I’m not even textbook Asian i.e. Malay, not Chinese. It’s one thing to have to take it from someone from the other side, but to be passed comments and judgment by someone who’s from the same team? It might not make a person any less proud of their cultural descent, but it doesn’t express the kind of sentiment anyone would expect to hear and therefore, that initial anger is alright. However, once the rage simmers down to a boil, it’d be wise to take note that it’s just a preference, and while everyone can be proud of something, ‘appreciation’ is a whole other level.

Then there’s the chance that you didn’t feel anything at all. Everyone has a right to decide for themselves, and why react to race when it’s supposed to be a factor that’s not any more important than anything else? Here we are, harping on about race being meaningless in the big picture, so why should it be any less meaningless than wanting, say, a brunette over blondes? People like what they like, and you can’t expect every one of them – all billions – to share the same opinion. We should be relieved, really, because our differences needn’t be synonymous with segregation. Attraction isn’t caused by a single factor, and the one about race was probably brought to mine first because of its dramatic features.

So what did you think? Is someone who dates people of only a select gender a racist, or is it a preference? Would you consider it a fetish?

Here’s a reply to the above video, to get you started…

YouTube Preview Image

Feel free to leave opinions and comments below!

Be Sociable, Share!


  1. Anya, this is a good one. Maybe it’s FASHION. ‘Foreign accessries’ are more attractive… hahahasaa

    jamie’s last blog post..huh?!

    • Thanks, Jamie!

      Haha! That could be right. Asian girls treat Caucasian men like trophies, and Caucasian men like Asian girls because they’re exotic.

      But that still bears the question as to why Asian guys are considered a certain way around the world – the gamers, the geeks… – and it makes me feel bad because that’s part of why they’re in such a bad light!

      Thanks for the comment. I’m hoping it’ll boost other people’s argumentative skills and motivate more people to start writing here!

      Anya’s last blog post..TRANCE ENERGY!

      • hhhmmm… gamers and geeks exist in every world – Asian, Caucasian, etc… Maybe Caucasians are more well-built (from all the dairy products they consume, haha) But there are cute Asian boys too, who need more confidence and charisma…

        jamie’s last blog post..huh?!

        • Yeah, that’s true.. there are some pretty tough Asian boys out there. We’ve got Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee and STILL Asian boys are perceived as ‘fragile’.

          Another thing that bothers me, though, is that White girls don’t treat Asian boyfriends any less or more special that a White boy as their boyfriend.. and doesn’t the fact that Asian girls are thought to be ‘exotic’ a little demeaning? And why do Asian girls treat Caucasian boyfriends like trophies?

          Anya’s last blog post..TRANCE ENERGY!

  2. oooh. “white” meat ey? but yes, it is very rare that you will find a caucasian female with an asian male. it is always an asian female with a caucasian male.
    hmmm, wonder what has that got to say about asian males!


    • Yeah.. I wonder why they’re not thinking about the hot breed of Asian models. If ‘Asian guy’ brings to mind games and glasses, why does ‘Asian girl’ – to some Caucasian males anyway – mean exotic to a pervy level?

      Anya’s last blog post..I never beg but….

  3. i think it’s a matter of preference. like the dark and mysterious guy vs. the funny guy in class. maybe there are certain characteristics that usually comes with someone of a particular race. like maybe white guys are more open minded and maybe asians are more cultured/less outgoing? i’m saying MAYBE k. and maybe these people generalize those characteristics to a certain race. so its not that their being racist, its just that they prefer certain attributes that is usually found in someone of a particular race. am i making sense?

    and i agree with the guy in the video, if it’s to the extend where you wouldn’t even look at asian (or white or whichever) guys or even think of dating them then THAT’S definitely being racist. and maybe there are certain stereotypes of certain races that cause this as well, like how in malaysia maybe some chinese girls won’t date malay boys because they’re perceived as being lazy / slackers.

    so i guess it all depends on the person and their perception of people from a particular race, whether good or bad.

    ze’s last blog post..more tumblring

    • That makes sense. And stereotyping is pretty common in Malaysia, even though people are more integrated these days than they ever have been, so it might be just as widespread in other places where races are split down pretty evenly.
      I can’t help but wonder, though, if there were more Asian-with-an-accent people where she comes from, because how different would they then be from her, and if that were the case, does being ruled down have anything to do with a physical appearance as well…

      And thanks for dropping by!

      Anya’s last blog post..I never beg but….

Speak Your Mind