Knowing Your Pattern of Relationship – Collateral Patterns Part 2

Avoidance Relationships

Ø May involve people who protect themselves against any deep intimacy with others or any full contact with their own deeper feelings and people who have just came out of a relationship, who are afraid of painful feelings of loss, mourning, and failure that will eventually lead to splitting up
Ø In some cases, partner may be someone who doesn’t introduce her to friends and business associates
Ø There may be a heavy emphasis on sex of a way of suppressing the painful feelings
Ø Self-disclosure is low and mistrust of oneself, the other or both is high
Ø Often the beginnings and the endings are abrupt

Pastime Relationships

Ø It is essentially recreational; for fun and games
Ø Hopes may attach themselves but expectations seldom do
Ø A summer romance is likely to be a pastime relationship
Ø Passionate, delightful, and tender while it lasts, there is no expectation that it should be more than that
Ø “Going with it fully for all of what it is” is the dominant mood and theme

Now that is a real long pattern of relationships. When I first read this typology devised by Carmen Lynch, and edited by Victor Daniels, I was really amazed by the explanations. It made me ponder for the whole night; which pattern of relationship defines mine. I am honored to make a summary of this typology at this site to share this piece of valuable information to the public.

Happy reading!

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