Long Distance Relationships: Love The Distance Or Distance The Love?

In the ancient history of dove-mailing, distance did make the heart grow fonder between lovers.  Today, it should be so much easier to keep and tender a long distance relationship especially with God-given phones, emails, instant messaging programme, video conferencing and more upcoming ITC innovations. Right?

In this contemporary materialistic world, like Madonna sang it, material girl (and boy) just wants to have fun.  The knot we tie today is so loose that everything may just crumble at a pull.

It is just surprising that with the avant-garde communication developments, why people find it even harder to stay in long distance relationships?  Is long distance relationship a thing of the past or we just find it hard to keep our hearts from wandering?

long-distance-relationship

Among my circle of friends, I’ve only heard of failed long distance relationships.  Honestly, when my then boyfriend left for the UK for his Degree, the relationship didn’t last through 6 months.

A few years later, Sherene, a college mate, anticipated the reunion with her beau while waiting for her transfer papers.  When she reached Australia a year later, it was the reunion break.

I met this sweet intern girl who loves her boyfriend so much that she is willing to give long distance relationship a shot.  When the boyfriend came back for Christmas holiday last year, it was yet another homerun for a break up.

Many will be thrilled and most would try anything to keep the relationship going, even though separated by continents and regions and oceans.  And seriously, how many of these relationships lasted to ring the merry bells?  Some did end with “… and they live happily ever after”, but the question is why most don’t, anymore?

Is it because… people changed?
In my imaginary screenplay, people used to tie the knot even before marriage.  They believed in true love, knotted the string to their heart and kept it in a secret (or sacred) place.  But today, many would say… “It’s the twentieth century, my dear.  Break ups and divorces are now as easier as hooking up and getting married.”

Is it because of… selfishness?
When the lover is three oceans away, the feeling of obligation and the need for companionship became an excuse to justify our need to meet new people and other people.  A girl-friend told me that “…he might well be enjoying himself with some blonde hotties, so why should I deprive myself from love?”

Is it because of… insecurity?
Distance may make the heart grow fonder but it may also make the heart go wander.  People who had gone through an unfaithful relationship will most probably fall in this category.  I remembered a guy-friend told me last year, “… she did it once.  What makes you think she wouldn’t do it again?  It’s just hard for me to trust her when I’m not around.”  Sometimes insecurity makes our mind run wild with imaginations that may not be true.  And just because we thought of it so much so that it became true, eventually.

Is it because of… loneliness?
It becomes a sudden throbbing pain when two people shared every second, every minute, every hour, every day, every week, every month… together, had to be separated, even for just a little while.  When distance calls, loneliness looms in to haunt both the distant lovers.  “Who would I go to the movies with?  Who would pick me up for lunch?”

Sometimes when we are too attached or too dependent on the other person, we are lost when they are gone.  And we develop the urge to find someone to replace the loneliness in our heart and hand.

Long distance relationship may be a beautiful fairy tale, when both make an effort to nurture and keep the relationship fresh from afar.  So, whether couples in long distance relationships are truly loving the distance or distancing the love… the only stronger than any other spells, to keep a relationship alive – beyond distance and separation, over mountains and under the seas, through good and bad – is the Love Potion.

Long distance relationship? Some people say most of them failed. What is your stand on long distance relationship and your personal thoughts about this? Do feel free to comment and I am looking forward to hear from all of  you. :)

PS: Picture Courtesy of IStockPhoto

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Comments

  1. Hey Jamie.. I’ll be the first to comment cause I’m in a long distance relationship with a very lovely girl now for quite a long time… for me.. as long as you keep the relationship honest.. always faithful and Love your other half with all your heart… I don’t see any problem with a long distance relationship… people nowadays don’t believe in long distance relationship because they believe that their other half will find someone better when they are not beside them… well.. have we notice that even if you see your other half everyday, but if both are not honest or ready to Love each other with all their heart..the same thing would definitely happen too… the main problem is not about the distance.. it’s all about how much we are willing to give out to be a lover.. sometimes we concentrate too much on what will we get from our other half and we forgot to give them what we should at first… Love is something really beautiful… God made us not to be alone but He has our other half for us… Don’t let our past relationship or relationships’ experience to slow us down in believing that there is a true Love out there waiting for us… I believe fully that me and my “Kiddo” ( as I called her that all the time :P ) will definitely tie the knot in near future cause we are fully in Love with each other, trust each other and have faith that all the dreams that we share together will come true very soon even though we are so many thousand miles away from each other :D God bless :D

    • Thank you, Jez for being the first to comment on my first article in Cupid Blogger Dot Com!

      I totally agree with you on true love, trust and faith in a relationship. Maybe long distance relationship doesn’t usually work out because of insecurity. Come to think of it, the main problem may not be the ‘distance’. But we make ‘distance’ the problem.

      I wish you all the best in love to you and your kiddo!

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  2. hi.. im jez’s friend.. For me… I am now in a long distance relationship. We had our ups and downs… Love will make it work out… despite of all the things around. It’s not just the distance …. we are on different religions and different nationality. We know were we stand and I’m confident about us. I guess it depends on everyone. Some think it’s just a waste of time. Other’s say its hard, will never work. But if you have good understanding… it will work out even your standing on different country.. no but’s no if’s :) Everything is possible.. :)

    • Dear Carla,

      I would like to salute you and your other half for keeping your long distance relationship sailing. I know how difficult it is, and I know how must effort both of you need to put in to make it work.

      And yes, like many other obstacles, distance is one of the hurdles in a relationship. If we overcome all the hurdles in a relationship, we know it’s all worth it – after all our sacrifices and efforts, we will be rewarded with love…

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  3. Hello :) Wanted to add my comment to this article as I am one of them… One of the people who decided they are ready for all the hardships and commitments in the name of love. It is true, as you said above that mostly we hear about failed relationships which weren’t able to survive because of the fact, that he or she weren’t ready or prepared what distance really brings… Even though there is someone to talk to, to share your problems,to be with you when you need it(at least virtually), someone who would understand your problems, something is still missing… Hardships include not being able to see the person whenever we want, not being able to hug when the other half is down, not being able to sleep everynight and be sure when they wake up, they won’t be alone… But what is all this in comparison with the happiness and that beautiful feeling which makes your fly even if you don’t have wings… How unimportant is all this, when you Love and are Loved… I believe God created every human being making sure there is their other half, their soulmate and true Love. We just need to look with our heart and be ready to give all we have inside for the other person. I believe that true Love means that you give away your heart to get your partner’s heart instead. Now your task, is to care for it as if it was your own even if you are separated by highest mountains and widest oceans… For me personally, the thought that we may suffer now a bit is nothing in comparison with the thought that very soon we will be together and then we will devote to each other forever :) Many people may say that kind of love is childish or exists in fairy tales only… I believe in our Love in 101% as I believe that one day I will say “Yes” to him only and we will be together till the end of the world and one day longer :)
    Love you Kiddo :)
    Hugs to Jamie :D

    • Alicja, thank you for reminding us the beauty and wonder of love. It is truly all about commitment and our responsibility towards nurturing our relationship – be it close or long distance.

      Maybe I haven’t seen enough long distance relationships that work, but deep in my heart (as I feel your love for your loved one), I truly wish that your passion will inspire, strengthen and give hope to lovers in long distance relationship.

      Cheers!

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  4. In all honesty, long distance relationship is easier said than done. I’m not trying to appear pessimistic, in most cases or I should say 90% of the time, it leads to a breakup (or fidelity) I attribute this to the fact that people do change due to unforced adaptation of a new culture which leads to a change of thinking and eventually, a change of heart.

    OK! I’m not speaking from my own experience, lest my opinion is biased but I’ve been traveling all my life from one country to another since young. I pretty much know how it feels….

    Anyway, interesting topic, Jamie. I love your pick of title, “Love The Distance or Distance The Love?” Classic.

    Yan

    • Yan,

      I agree that it is easier said than done because truly, people do change. Even married couples changed their minds (and hearts) sometimes.

      One of the doors that is most difficult to guard, is the door to our heart… because we have emotions. From my own experience, I find it difficult to keep the door closed, when love is knocking on my front door.

      Yan, let’s hope that what didn’t work for us, will work for others… *smile*

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  5. Hello. I am a (long distance) friend of Jez. Very well writen article. Many truths here. I was once in a long distance relationship myself once at one point in my life, but that relationship did not work out. It didn’t work out because I knew in my heart that this man was not right for me. I believe things work out for a reason. But when there is a boundary between you and the person you love, in example: having a long distance realtionship, there are ways of overcoming it if you truly love this person and truly want to be with them. But there are also risks of having a long distance relationship. Lonliness, in the sence of not be able to hold the person you love, is a risk that leads a lot of people who are engaged in this kind of relationship to stray. So, if you truly, deeply, love the person on the other side of the continent, then you will prevail.

    • Kelly, overcoming obstacles in relationships take great courage… And didn’t God create light and darkness? The good and bad? So, likewise there is always a solution (or a few solutions) to a problem.

      In any circumstances, there is always a way to overcome it. But the question is… are we strong enough for the battle? Can we fight all odds in the name of love?

      It’s really up to us, and what we believe in.

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  6. Hi i am Jez’s friend.. I am not in a long distance relationship, but soon I’ll be one of them, cos my love Preeti is going US :((
    I believe love must be in hearts, if u love ur partner from ur heart then distance hardly matters.

    I believe in God & i have a feeling that HE has written our role plays in his diary (somethng like that) whatevr we do he has written all. So if we love some1 its God who want us to get in love with that guy/girl. If we cheat some1, its God who want us to cheat that guy/girl. We (human beings) are just doing what he has written for us to do. I am sure Jez bro will be raising his eyebrows on what i have written, but i think this way.

    Anyone whose Long Distance Relationship works will say its good & worth the effort (Kat & Matt) & vice versa (Con bro & Nutter). So its depends on person to person.

    I am sure with my these words a lot of questions will be raised. Don’t worry send me all those questions..

    Regards to jie jie Jamie.

    • Hello AD Sharma, firstly, I wsh you all the best with Preeti. If there’s a WILL to keep the relationship going, there’s always a WAY – and all else doesn’t matter anymore.

      Technically, long distance relationship is still a ‘relationship’ in itself. The difference is that the relationship is ‘challenged’ by distance. And those who manage to keep it going till death do they part, will be greatly honoured because they have persevered and overcome the challenge.

      So, prepare yourself for the challenge and know that when you prevail, you both are winners in love!

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  7. Yan, let’s hope that what didn’t work for us, will work for others… *smile*

    Now that’s what I call ‘noble’ thought. I’m beginning to love your style, Jamie.

    Now when love is all around, do you find it difficult to keep the door closed when another love is knocking on your door? *smile*

    Yan

    [email protected] last blog post..Get Paid to Blog – Make Money Online Writing Reviews in 2009

    • Once again… thank you, Yan!

      I believe that everyone love differently. And if others can ove much better than I do, this world will be a lovable place to live in.

      In respond to your question… Yes, I find it hard to keep the door closed when another love is knocking on my door!

      This world is full of temptations (especially in love – we just can’t get enough of love), hence we’ll need to strengthen our will and principles. For me: love builds relationships; and loyalty keeps relationships.

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  8. But you could say the very same thing about regular relationships. How many “short” distance relationships is a person in before they find “the one?” It’s been reported that people break up in long distance relationships just as frequently as they do in normal relationships. A relationship isn’t doomed just because it is a long distance one.

    • Michelle, you are right! That’s why ‘distance’ becomes an issue when we make it an issue.

      Maybe because ‘long distance’ is tagged along with long distance relationship, hence it becomes the excuse or reason for break ups all the time.

      Maybe regular relationships are just relationships, anything and everything become the possibilities to call it off.

      Could this be a phychological parameter?

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  9. Jamie, personally I think that the problem is people themselves… Nowadays society, especially the youth, is more into “I don’t really care” kind of relationship than “For good and bad till the end” kind of. This is mainly caused by previous experiences. I’ve noticed, at least in the place I live in, that most of couples break up for the very similar reasons. The most common issues are dishonesty, unloyalty,boredome and lack of interest in building a healthy, true relationship in which they both will be satisfied and happy. In my environment there are many girls/guys who once being cheated on, decided to never involve themselves into relationships never again as they did at the first place. That leads to the situation when in next partnership they are the ones to be the “bad side” and the ones who will destroy what could be so beautiful. In this case we cannot wonder that many of long distance relationships or those “short” distant ones will never result in a lifelong marriage.
    At this point, we should sit down and think, is it the society that has changed so much and turned people into cold-blooded selfish creatures, or maybe it’s us who decided to change under those circumstances so that we are not different from the others…??
    In my opinion, we should always look deep inside our heart and follow what does it say… I also believe good brings good back, so never be afraid of your true feelings and reveal them to your Love one not looking at those bad experiences from the past :)
    If we follow the society, very soon the statistics will be terrifying showing us higher rate of divorces than marriages… So please, don’t let that to happen everyone, and Love each other as God taught us :)

    • Alicja, thanks for your deep thoughts on this topic. I once used to carry pain, hurt and disappointment from the long distance relationship that didn’t work… and that hindered me from fully loving the present lover. How selfish and unfair can this be, right?

      But along the way, I also learnt that when we love, we will be loved in return. If we fear to love, others will fear to love us as well… so, i thought “what the heck, might as well spread the love and make this world a better lovable place, eh?” *wink*

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  10. Lisa Jones says:

    I love long distance relationships, my only one ended last year unfortunatly and probably for most the reasons jamie mentions…this girl knows what she is talking about i’d say keep long distance relationships alive, try it you wont regret it i still love my ex but understand he will never love me again! xx

    • Lisa Jones, in any relationship – be it long or close distance – when we put our whole heart into nurturing the relationship… we know we’ve given our best. So, there’s no regrets being in any relationships, there’s only lessons learnt and experience gained to help make us a better lover in the next relationship.

      Remember, when one door closes, another opens… keep your heads up, girl *smile*

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  11. sometimes, you could. its the one on the other side that couldn’t. no matter how hard you try. avoiding every possible chances of doubt, waiting everyday for him to come home. he asked me to wait for him before he left. and reminded me of that every single day. he promised he would come back to me. and he never did. and all hope fell from the highest peak of earth down (and buried) into the earth’s core. then you dont know what to feel, what to do, what to believe and what to trust anymore…

  12. Hi,
    Your article attracted me cos I’m also in a long distance relationship.
    It’s been 1.5 years with my baby and we are going to be together forever with God’s bless :)
    I live in Jakarta, Indonesia, and he’s in Texas, USA. We knew each other from a dating website, hehehe… At the beginning it was tough since we only talked on the phone and sending e-mails and pictures. We must know our partner’s characters without seeing him/her. Fights and misunderstanding sometimes happened. But now, it’s like we are meant for each other. We think alike, we have same vision for our future.

    Mirna’s last blog post..Nice Girls Do It, Too!

    • Mirna

      Thank you for dropping by. Receiving posts like yours strengthen my belief that long distance relationships do work. It just reinforces that what didn’t work for will work for others, like yourself. So, I wish all lovers in long distance relationships to keep your heads up! If you weather through the distance, you’ll weather through other challenges too!

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

  13. Mirna,
    I know so very well what are you talking about, girl! I share the same kind of relationship as you do and I believe in it so strongly as you are :) It is great to hear that there are more people who still believe in Love no matter of how many obstacles are on their way! I wish you two the best of luck and hope you will meet soon and never will be apart :D Never change your mind about this feeling and keep it strong in your heart and never let any misunderstanding to lead you to the point when you decide to let it go… I never allow that kind of thought to even slightly appear in my head and wish you the same :D God Bless for you two!! :D

  14. Wow, I had no idea that so many people were involved in LDRs, and while I, for a fact, would not be able to survive one, a whole lot of respect goes out to the lot of you!

    :)

    In my opinion, it depends on what you want and what you expect from a relationship. I know I won’t be able to do it because I’m the kind of person who needs constant company and it just wouldn’t be the same thing if I were talking to them through a webcam. Unless of course we’d been dating a while and had to be apart for good reason, then the last thing I would consider relationship-wise is engaging in one with someone who is a thousand miles away.

    That said, congratulations to everyone who’s been in successful LDRs up to this point, and I hope you guys have many more to come!

    xoxo

    Anya’s last blog post..some things are easier typed out.

    • Anya, me too… I can’t survive a day without emotional and especially physical affections. I was just telling a friend ‘I have a wandering heart’ For me… out of sight (even a minute!!! *kidding*), is out of mind.

      So I truly admire all you who have proven yourselves worthy in love, and I realised I have much to learn from you guys! *phew*

      Jamie’s last blog post..language or translation?

      • @Jamie and Alicja,
        Me too…. When I had my close distance boyfriend, I always wanted to feel and be close to him. At that time, we met almost everyday because his office was very close to mine and he’d pick me up from office and send me to home.

        When I first started the relationship with my current LD-BF, I also wanted to be close to him. Problem is, we are thousands miles away, different time zone too. Once or twice I kept calling him although I knew it was his work hour. Then he was upset and we had big fight just because of that.
        There are some tricks to avoid that. As time goes by, I have “behaved” and feel very relaxed with the relationship, we trust each other, we believe in our love and relationship. I learn a lot from my bf too since his first marriage failed, he wants to do it right this time.

        Although sometimes I feel jealous when I see couples holding hands, go watch movie together, etc. I know the time will come for us to be together.

        @Anya,
        You are so lucky to be able to talk with your bf over webcam. The kind of job my bf has not allow us to be online. Thanks to cheap international phone rate, we are able to talk twice everyday.

        Keep the faith, Spread the LUV!
        More power to LDR, yee haa…………..

        Mirna’s last blog post..What Are the Odds of Finding Mr. Right Online?

  15. Thanks guys for spreading the love! We always hear people say, “Spread love in the world.” You people who are in LDR’s are the ones we salute for taking charge to spread love beyond borders. And giving hope to lovers all over the world…

    Bravo!

    • Jamie,

      That is absolutely true. As mentioned by Anya, I was very surprised that this topic on LDR received lots of good responses. In fact, this post has the highest comment so far. :)

      Keep it up your passion in writing and I am looking forward for your upcoming post. :)

  16. I think Distance is love.

    • Russian Women, I’m not too sure how you see distance as love? Distance is separation. Love is togetherness. So do you mind to explain why ‘distance is love’?

      Hope to hear from you soon.

      Jamie’s last blog post..is it true?

  17. I envy those who survived in a long distance relationship. I did not make it. I broke-up last October with the man I met online for three years, whom I had learned to fall in love. Our relationship was very painful due to distance. There was no single day in our yahoo chat that we did not fight, but we were so good in real life. We had a good time together when we met last May, we even planned to get married. But all my hope had gone when I accidentally learned his sexual fetishes such as scat and watersports, which he hid from me. I learned it because we shared passwords in all our accounts after we met. Still I endured with him in spite of what I learned, but things did not change. He still treated me so bad on yahoo. It was just repetitious, and I was so worried that I already became immune to pain. I thought many times before I finally decided to stop everything about us. I asked advice from many people, specially to those who both knew us online. I called many times to his landlord in UK. I talked to my mother and friends here. I did not know where did I got my guts to tell him that I wanted an official break-up. I did not talk to him longer, I turned off my computer and threw everything that would remind me of him: cell phone that he gave me, the papers that he sent me for the visa application, his t-shirt… everything. I deleted all my accounts. I was crying hard. It was liked living in hell. There were times that I stared in my computer screen with tears in my eyes. The pain was so unbearable knowing he was not there anymore, but I have to choose either to let him go NOW or NEVER. Love was not enough to sustain our relationship. All I can do right now is to pray to God for his guidance. It is not easy…

    • Dearest Mam, thank you for sharing your experience with us here. I understand how difficult it is to go through such pain in a relationship and I know it must be very difficult to even express in words what you went through.

      You are very brave to make a wise decision to let him go and move on. You are very brave to gather te courage to share such heart-moving experience.

      I pray that you find true love with His guidance!

      Hugs!

      jamie’s last blog post..two sides of a door

      • You are right Jamie, it was so hard. I got the courage to finally decide to cut everything about us because there came a time that I could not tolerate his lies anymore. It is very painful to lose him, but it is more painful to hold him knowing I do not trust him anymore. I just always remember what my mother told me when I failed the bar examinations; the All-seeing God does not play dice with our destinies,even pain has a purpose. I know someday I will still fall in love, at the right time with the right man. Right now, I am trying to give focus in my studies in the graduate school. Thank you for taking time to reply in my comment, I hope I help you understand more on what it takes to have a long distance relationship, specially to fall in love online.

        • mam, the pleasure is mine to reply to you. I wish you all te best in your studies and as God loves us, may you find true love in due time. Keep ya heads up, gal… love is the greatest, and love will never cease.

          jamie’s last blog post..two sides of a door

    • @Mam,

      When I started to go online searching for my love in 2006, I had to go through some trivial relationship with several guys first until I met my current bf.
      All of them didn’t show seriousness in the new relationship. Some disappeared just like that, with no news at all. Imagine how I felt, but I said to myself that I had to move on and not giving up on love.

      Your experience was something we all can learn from. It’s tough, I know, I hope you can be strong and find your true love.

      Mirna’s last blog post..What Are the Odds of Finding Mr. Right Online?

      • Mirna, it’s hard enough to sustain a LDR, but online dating is even harder because we don’t really know the other person. Although I’m not a fan of online dating, I found my first long-term relationship through the Internet.

        So, never say never. Love is in the air *wink*

        jamie’s last blog post..two sides of a door

      • @Mirna, just enjoy the moment, it is so nice to love and be loved even in a distance. What is important is that you are happy to be with that person, and he is also happy to be with you. He was my first chat mate, and the only man in the world whom I gave so much time and attention. It was so hard on my part because love was developed along the way, however I believe that I do not have to go on in a relationship that is full of lies. I am just hoping he will not be my last chat mate (lol. I read some success stories of online love affair, and I really envy them, but we have different experiences, and each of us has our own story. I do not want to be involved in a relationship right now, either online or in real life.I have had two heartaches, but this was more painful than the previous one, however it does not mean that I will not allow myself to fall in love again, but as of now, I want to give myself a chance to experience the wondrous feeling of being alone, away from pain. And if someday I will fall in love again, I hope it will be for a lifetime commitment and happiness. Good luck to you and God bless us all.

        • mam, the most important about failed relationships is that we learnt from it, improve and move on to love better… maybe even accepting the other person just as he/she is. and also, feel free to experince love once again *wink*

          jamie’s last blog post..two sides of a door

  18. Dear mam :)
    It’s really sad to hear your relationship has failed… It always pulls me down a bit hearing that someone has had a heartache because of no trust and lies. On the other hand, it makes me stronger also and smarter, helps me in not making some mistakes. It is true that the hardships of long distance relationships are sometimes very hard to overcome… But what does not kill us, makes us stronger, right? ;)I believe that each one of us, was created by God to Love and be Loved by someone, someone who was cut out only for us :) So please don’t keep grudges too long, cause I’m sure you are a great girl and you deserve a true Love! So please, don’t keep your doors closed for too long and when Love knocks on your door, don’t let it wait for too long :D
    With best wishes for you,

    Alicja

    *keeps her thumbs up*

    • Beloved Readers

      I’m glad Cupid Blogger Dot Com and this post connect all of us from different parts of the world. Undeniably, love is the greatest! Let’s share our love and make this world a better place *hugs*

      Love
      jamie

      jamie’s last blog post..two sides of a door

  19. Man, all the comments strike me. Nice post Jamie. =)

    I maybe gonna face this problem next year because of my other half maybe going to oversea and study. We promise to go oversea together and take Master but it seems abit blurry now. =/
    I might be selfish if i don’t let her go, but as time goes i felt like she wanna stay with me.

    As for me, i had the chance to go oversea 2 years ago.
    But i chose to stay by her because for me, no matter where am i in this world, as long as i am with her i will be allright.
    Not to say i am sticky type of guy or what, but i think if i am a ‘high quality’ guy i can get good result here in Malaysia uni as well.

    Now i pray to God to show me the way.

    ShinChan’s last blog post..Weather Report

    • Thank you, Shin Chan.

      LOVE does crazy things to us. And we do crazy things out of LOVE. The greatest part in love is that, with all the sacrifices done and gone, we look back and still realise we didn’t miss anything. You get what I mean?

      We’re still very looking forward to tomorrow because we know the decision we made years ago – was the RIGHT decision.

      God is LOVE. And in Him, we love others. I believe you’ll experience His utmost blessing and love – from the love you provide and the love you receive.

      Keep your heads up!

      Love on behalf of CupidBlogger team – jamie

      jamie’s last blog post..huh?!

  20. I sit here on my computer searching the internet because i have nothing better to do right now.. and i stumble onto this page and am very intrigued. I am in a long distance relationship, and every single thing you listed is something that every couple needs to work on in a relationship. You hit the nail on the head honey. We are lonely, we hurt for our lover, and our mind definitely wanders. But if you honestly love your partner before the distance, then everything should be fine. Love can concur anything, and a little thing like distance would never be the reason why our relationship would end. If you stay honest, faithful, and set up some “guidelines” then things will work – like calling each other every night, making sure that not only one person is visiting the other. I view any relationship like this (as vague as it may be) your relationship is like a job. You either do the work, or when the work isn’t worth it, you quit or get fired. If anyone stumbles upon this I hope you realize anything is possible, and a long distance relationship is more than possible.

  21. Title for my mother blog? hey! i wannabe commence writing a weblog and im a youthful new momma so i want it to sort of be about my child and life as a brand new mommy.. BUT i can’t think of a cute catchy weblog title! any ideas???? thanks ahead of time ;D

  22. Interior decorating whizzes assist! or anyone familiar with the Garage store change rooms!? I went into Garage the other day and i genuinely like the boo chic style the change rooms were in. With the Retro Retrotapeten wallpaper and the bold colors, with chandeliers. How can i locate Retrotapeten wallpaper like that? Or can i paint it like that by some means?

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  24. The amount of Sofortkredit charge cards should you have for you to repair Sofortkredit?I’m trying to rebuild my Sofortkredit right after ID theft, a few problems that were my own along with many years of basically devoid of just about any Sofortkredit reported. (I primarily utilize my personal credit minute card and also spend cash with regard to almost everything). We make good money right now along with am trying to repair in order to buy a condo over the following couple of years. Our very good company accounts (leasing, club, cable television, mobile, and so on.) never have documented my personal very good Sofortkredit. Now how several credit cards do i need to get that will help enhance my personal Sofortkredit report however , not prevent my own Sofortkredit. Thanks!

  25. Me and boyfriend have been together a year now. He’s in Germany, and I am in the UK. Yes, it gets damn tough, yes it’s very very hard, but a Long distance relationship has a certain difference to a close distance relationship for me. For starters, it’s not about sex, if it was I wouldn’t be going out with a guy who was 750km away from me. You have a strong sense of trust with the other person, you have to trust them because if you don’t, long distance suspicion will kill the relationship. I love him, he loves me, and for us although a long distance relationship isn’t convenient, it holds a pure quality, a trustworthy and beautiful quality that not many modern day couples have. You love that person because of their personality and mind — and I really do mean that — not for their sexiness and allure, or their material goods.

  26. victoria paudel says:

    well, me and my fiance have beeen dating for almost a year now but the major problem is that he is from california and i am from illinois! we both are taking things slow until i am really with him forever! if people say long distance relationsship cant last well there wrong! it can u just have to trust your mate and be postive never negative! they are just mad that they had a long distance relationship and it didnt work so they think that it wont work for other people!!!!!!!!!!!! love:Victoria Paudel

  27. Victoria's Husband says:

    Yea, everything my wife say is true. I believe in every word she says and I am always there for her no matter what the circumstances are. It has been that way and it will always be like that. I am glad I found her in my life and I thank god for bringing her to my life. The most I can say is I am the happiest man alive when I am with her. And this is a long distance relationship. ;-)

  28. Aww can you make a picture like that with tampico, mexico and netherlands?

    I would love you for that :x

  29. I confirm that it’s really hard for two lovers who used to be together every second for a very long time and have to be apart afterwards. Loneliness arises fast if apart. It is feasable to stay apart when you share your daily life and every moment as if you were together (email, instant messenger, etc) and your sweetie does the same way. But if some problems arise (fight about sth, disagreement, jalousie, …) you need to get along fast or it would be over fast. Try to forgive, to be soft with your sweetie if you truly love her/him. Try to understand. Discuss everything. There are always solutions to problems. Try to get along as fast as you can and to motivate each other and remind each other of the time you spend together happily. Don’t give up. Fight, if you truly want to spend your whole life with your sweetie. Words are here very important. Don’t rush with words that you will regret afterwards. Words are everything in this position.
    – Peace and Love for All –

  30. I got inspiration from learning about the long distance relationship between a close friend and his girlfriend. The two where seperated by distance (Netherlands – Denmark) but, as they told me, each morning one of them would wake up the other by calling on the phone and sing a little song. Cute!

    And I can say it paid off: they now live together. So there is always hope!

    I was inspired to design Wakelicious Alarm Clock, an iPhone app for people in a LDR with which you can surprise your loved one, where ever they may be, with your handpicked YouTube video. With Wakelicious sharing music is like showing your feelings or thoughts without the need of actually saying/writing it.

    I hope everyone in a long distance relationship can keep the love going, and use Wakelicious to wake up with a song from their loved ones (http://www.wakelicious.com).

  31. what makes long distance relationships so hard this day and age is because really, people are so used to being in constant communication with each other (because the world is in constant communication via the media on tv, smart phones, internet, wi fi, cell phones, text messages, webcam, etc), that it really makes it SO.MUCH.HARDER to accept the inability to communicate for periods of time. Back in the day, it was accepted that it was hard to communicate over long distances, and people could wait so much more easily because they already were used to waiting for everything – you barely traveled outside a certain radius of your home town. Now people’s perception of their space is much more expanded, because of cars and planes and the internet, that the urgency to be with the person that is farther away puts more stress on it than it would have been 50 or 100 years ago.

    also, with the world putting so much emphasis on our “futures” (education, jobs), we are constantly looking so far into the future about every other aspect in our lives that it adds on an additional stress… will we still be together next year? When will we actually live in the same state/country? What if I go to grad school? will he/she wait that long for me? what if they don’t want to move here/i don’t want to move there/they don’t want to wait that long? I think that is another stress factor in distance relationships, because it isn’t something a “normal” relationship has to think about as much, and it isn’t something that people had to think about as much “back in the day”, because the world wasn’t as sped up as it is now.

    I’ve been in a long distance relationship for 4 years (chile and the states), and sometimes it is the most unbearable thing in the world. The most stressful thing? Just the inability to communicate… not being able to pick up the phone or call and know how he is doing, because that is what we are so used to doing with everything. Sometimes I think about it and get mad at myself for even getting stressed about it, but the fact is, it’s what we are used to. That’s why, I think, long distance relationships are so much harder. It makes people want to give up so much more easily because they feel like they are losing and failing if they go a few days or a week without “decent” communication.

    Of course, trust is another issue, but if someone goes into a long distance relationship without much trust, it wasn’t much of a relationship to begin with. :) And if anyone thinks some of the stuff above (“he could be hanging out with other girls, why shouldn’t I?”) It is basically still a trust issue.

    My long distance road has been hard and have had loads of ruts and bumps along the way, but being able to openly communicate all our feelings and frustrations about everything in our lives and especially the frustrations about the distance is what makes us able to still be together. You just have to remember to really understand sometimes why you actually feel angry, because sometimes when you argue you think it is them, but it really is the inability to communicate that you are angry with, or your insecurity of their attachment to you.

    anyway, that’s what I think. :)

  32. Hi, my name is Luca. I’m having a great long distance relationship… As long as the distance between Italy and Los Angeles is :) It started 2 years ago and it is still going on… Moving to LA this Christams! Ciao ciao!

  33. hello,
    i have my first distance relationship, and seems we dont have lucky because my family don’t like him, he have another religion and im from Brazil and him Egypt, but we he will come here to speak with my family and we plane to marry, hope yes, inchallah :P
    distance is detail,
    u can talk for hours, miss smile, remember jokes, sometimes u can know better than a person u see every day.

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